How can I stop being a fool?

Can quitting lead to more happiness?

How quitting can make you happier

It may sound counter-intuitive or just plain crazy - giving up more often in order to have a better life. This is exactly what wellness experts and life coaches say to their clients and friends these days. If things don't work out for you, just give up and move on.

This could be a hard pill to swallow given the importance society places on never giving up. It's in our movies. The hero often saves the day and wins by never giving up on insurmountable opportunities.

It's in our music. Motivational lyrics are full of lines that highlight the virtues of never stopping ... never. Entrepreneurship is enormous. Business moguls tell you to keep working hard no matter what, and you will eventually make it.

This is especially true for men. We were conditioned to consider giving up or making a course correction a colossal failure. It's downright unmanly.

Some of it comes from outdated social norms. Part of it has to do with a certain cognitive bias that skews our reasoning. It's called the sunk cost fallacy.

Basically, we hesitate to let go of something if we have already invested a lot of time, energy, money or emotions in it. We just keep hitting it just because we've hit it already.

It doesn't make any sense at all, but the sunk cost fallacy is one of the reasons we don't just walk away to find something better.

Wellness experts are at the forefront of this mental war. Dwight Goldwinde is a Transformative Life Coach with 32 years of experience. He is a writer, consultant and lives an extraordinary life in Kunming, China.

If you want really unconventional answers to life's questions, just ask Dwight how. Here are his thoughts on why we value persistence in quitting.

“This fact is evidence of the ongoing war that exists in almost all of us between us Now and our Next . When we lion our next and demonize our now, it makes perfect sense that we worship perseverance and slander quitting. "

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Dwight continues, “Yes, in many circumstances it makes sense to keep going, trying again, and not giving up. And when we have made peace between now and next, so that now can enjoy the process of all that pursues next, it will be easy to act persistently. '

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'But in different circumstances, when we learn something new that we did not know about when we made the original decision, when new circumstances arise that did not exist before and we did not foresee, quitting may be our perfect new choice. '

Let's be honest folks. Perseverance isn't always the best choice. You will not earn medals or cool points for persisting in a toxic relationship, persisting in a dead end, or persisting in a self-destructive train of thought.

A wiser man knows when to hold on to something and when to let go of it.

It's like Johnny Cash said, 'You need to know when to hold it, when to fold it.'

You could make more money telling your boss, 'I'm quitting!'

According to data from the Labor Statistics Office, people certainly know when to quit their jobs. In fact, in 2018, people volunteered to quit their jobs at a rate we haven't seen in nearly 20 years. So why are people kicking out forever these days?

Well, wages are stagnating and the labor market is not growing to keep up with the cost of living. People find that it just doesn't happen to work hard every day in hopes of getting noticed, promoted, or elevated. In this case, persistence doesn't pay off. It just locks you in your cabin.

What happens as a result of the mass migration of dead-end jobs is that people are finding better paying jobs, or at least starting a new job in a higher position than they were before. The average is around a 15% raise when someone leaves a job for a new one.

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By quitting your job, you are essentially putting the leverage back in your favor. Now you can reset the terms of your career to increase your earning potential.

It may sound a bit risky, but if you are educated, highly skilled, and possibly have good references, you could be giving up on your path to a better life.

Here are some more healthy things to quit:

  • Compare yourself to others
  • Neglect what you actually want instead of what you think is necessary
  • Micromanagement for every thought and action
  • I try to please other people
  • Making excuses for how unfortunate it is now to pay off later

It's not just for work. Quitting can also help you improve other areas of your life. It's true. You can give up and still win.

If you give up on impressing other people, you will find more value in the life you already have. Giving up rethinking all of your decisions and micromanaging your life will allow you to be more aware of the present moment and enjoy life more.

If you give up judging yourself, you may find yourself loving yourself even more. If you give up on the idea that wanting to play Xbox tonight is so bad, you might be more productive if you give yourself a moment of fun before the hard work begins.

Wrap up

Giving up has always been slandered. We have been taught that perseverance overcomes every obstacle in life. For men, giving up is something like losing. When we stop doing something or someone, we may feel like a failure.

However, this is not always the case. Perseverance has its place, but a sane man knows when the better course of action is inaction. If you're going the wrong way, just quit.

If you give up now, you can avoid another 10 years of horrific marriage. You might give up getting a degree in a field your parents wanted you to start and start a business in an industry that you are passionate about.

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If your boss passed you over for that crucial raise, give up. Find a new job and set the bar yourself.

Exiting doesn't have to be a mistake. In fact, it can be a tremendous source of strength for you.

'If you don't succeed at first, try again. Then stop. There's no point in being a fucking fool. " -TOILET. Fields